BLACK GIRL JOY IS OUR BIRTHRIGHT

“Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it, you must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.”-Eat, Pray, Love

The search for our inner happiness begins and ends with us. No one can provide us with the happiness we seek, rather, it requires us to go within and pull it out from our core. Being co-dependent on others to validate our worth and meet our expectations is detrimental to cultivating and sustaining our happiness. Truth is, it is our birthright to attain and protect this. Once you recognize the responsibility is yours only, you will no longer fall on the swords of others.

James Oppenheim once said, "The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." 2023 is all about getting our happiness back and thriving in our black girl joy! Every day when our feet hit the ground, we are going to choose to be happy in all aspects of our lives no matter the challenges that day may bring. Obviously, it’s easy to be happy when everything seems to be going great in life, but true happiness comes in how you maintain it during trying times in life.

The power lies within us to remove blockages and limitations by allowing our light to shine bright and blaze the trail in all the dark places in our lives.

We can all achieve this by:

• Releasing anything and anyone that makes you unhappy; make sure you are precise and stand on it.

• In the face of challenges do not coward out, power through those experiences

• Harness your independence, do not compromise it, and be the shot caller and the playmaker of your life. Never allow your environment to influence your decisions and life.

• No one likes a control freak, so let go of what you can’t control and let things flow in your life as they should.

• Stay grounded in your emotions and do not lose your ability to be centered. Life throws a lot of curve balls our way, so never allow it to defeat you. Maintain your inner equilibrium and a positive attitude as much as you can.

• Embrace the necessary changes in your life. Part of being happy is about being flexible, agile, and willing to pivot when your plans fall through. There is a saying that goes “ we make plans and God laughs” meaning we can plan out our lives in details but there’s always unexpected and unforeseeable twist and turns that may occur. In these instances, you have to be willing to adapt and change course.

• Never be afraid to cut through and unpack any negative feelings you may experience. Allow your inner light to guide you through any illusions or darkness that you may be experiencing at any given moment in life.

• There’s a saying that goes “you cannot prevent the birds of sadness from flying over your head, but you can keep them from building nests in your hair”-Confucius, when you find your mind wondering in unhappy moments, quiet the noise, disregard the distractions, and focus on your focus! Having self-discipline and ability to control your thoughts more, can help you ensure that you stay in a place of optimism and positivity.

AFFIRMING ALL THAT IS AMAZING IN 2023!

I am a huge believer in positive affirmations, call me a dreamer, but I have seen it work in miraculous ways.

What I do know is that a pessimistic mind does not produce anything optimistic and or positive in our lives no matter what goal setting approach we adapt. The key to living an internally enriched life, one must use a combination of positive affirmation to train the mind to only absorb and release optimism and set actionable steps to meet your goals.

To motivate my fellow melanated Queens and provide words of inspiration, encouragement, and empowerment, below are some black girl magic affirmations, because we simply Rock! Put them on sticky notes, write them on your bathroom mirror, and or transfer them into your phone as a daily reminder of your dopeness.

1. I am a dynamic Queen, who deserves all that is beautiful, abundant, and good in life.

2. I deserve to put myself on a pedal stool and give myself flowers for the woman that I am and or becoming.

3. I am only interested in surrounding myself with a tribe of healed women who recognize their worth and value.

4. I laugh in the face of systematic oppression, because this Black Girl Magic is dope on all levels

5. I am decluttering my mind, space, and life to make room for the beautiful experiences that are yet to come.

6. Changing my mindset, leads to a changed life.

7. I have an inestimable worth that comes for my creator, so I seek validation from no one.

8. I am a divine original fashioned by God to be radiantly beautiful inside and out.

9. I am cultivating my inner peace and diving deep into my faith.

10. I do not wait and depend on anyone to fulfill and choose me, because I choose myself each and every time.

11. I am stepping outside of my comfort zone and expanding my horizon fearlessly.

12. I will not allow others to mold me, I will not allow others to water me down, and I will not simplify my complexity to make others comfortable with my being and existence.

13. I will raise my vibrations and frequency, so I attract that which aligns with me on every level

14. I will never accept the bare minimum, unrequited energies, and that which I do not deserve.

15. I seek depth and substance not superficiality and vanity.

16. When respect is no longer served on the menu, I will respect myself enough to gracefully exit stage left.

17. I believe in universal law, so I am only attracting good karma and positive vibes.

18. Wherever my energy goes, my attention flows.

19. I am the only one who knows how capable I am … so I believe in myself and my infinite power!

20. I am thankful for not being where I used to be and grateful for where I am still yet to be!

21. When someone shows me who they are, I will always believe who they are. People’s actions and or inaction always speaks for them.

22. I honor my good character and integrity and will never sell myself short to appease the masses

23. I am learning from each mistake I have made and turning my lessons into wisdom.

24. Change is inevitable, and I welcome good changes in my life.

25. I am a work in progress, I respect my journey.

26. I refuse to match negative energies, so I choose to only entertain the positive in my life.

27. Everyone I lost was never a loss but a protection for my own betterment.

28. It's not the job of others to recognize my worth, it's always my responsibility to recognize my worth so I never accept anything or anyone who do not deserve me.

29. I will show up in life with kindness and a gentle nature but will be confident and assertive when I need to.

30. I will not escape reality but boldly live in my experiences and truth.

31. I will always pour into cups who only pour back into me equally.

32. I am loving the sound of my feet walking away from anything and anyone who tries to deplete me.

33. I am a force to be reckon with and I will not shy away from this.

34. When life gives me lemonade, I will throw it back at life and tell it to make its own lemonade

35. No longer will I set myself on fire to make others feel warm.

36. I am letting go of any self-limiting thought process and ideas.

37. Stop collecting red flags they are not a badge of honor.

38. I will not be the airport and transit for other people's emotional baggage.

39. Stay away from half ass people, who behave in half ass ways, and only do half ass things.

40. Do away with victim mentality and step into your victor vibes.

Xoxo

@Blackgirlsnamaste

QUIETING THE NOISE: OPERATION MIND RESET!

Within the last few years, I am sure life has gotten busy and hectic by the minute for most of us. From our daily grind and hustle, to running business ventures and endeavors, exploring various avenues, and being breadwinners and providers for our families. Additionally, due to the constant threat we face as black people in general, with the recent increase in police violence against our community, Black Lives Matter movement alone has reopened a psychological wound on us. Both direct and indirect micro-aggressions, continues to affect black women’s mental health on the regular and this alone has created a level of racial trauma, depression, hypervigilance, and anxiety for us all. As someone who takes in a lot of social justice and global human rights information and due to the nature of my work, I often have to use my cerebral to the absolute max, which means my brain is constantly on overdrive into the wee hours of the night, and I’m lucky if I can squeeze in 4hours of sleep.

With all of this craziness as a backdrop, we need a moment to breathe and just woosah! To mitigate this, below are a few quick tips that can help us all quiet the noise, recenter, and reset our expansive minds.

Below are 5 easy quick tips to help you reset your brain while on the go!

Let Go of Any Negative Self-Talk: Often when life gets out of control, it's easy to become more pessimistic. We turn into our biggest critics, which eventually takes a toll on our mental health and brain power. By speaking more positivity into our lives, it can help us better maneuver different situations that comes up during our days. Use daily positive affirmations and mantras to train and reset your mind. The more positive and or optimistic you are, the better your manifestations become. The more self-disciplined your mind has; it allows you to take in positive information and express your emotions in a healthy manner.

Remember, from your mouth to God’s ears. What comes out of your mouth whether negative or positive, can truly determine what results you gain in life.

• Every morning, write something positive about yourself that you love and put it on sticky notes and post it in visible areas in your home as a reminder. So, every time you need a quick pick me up, you can refer to them.

• Download affirmations and mantra apps from your Appstore. I like these because, they provide daily notifications of great positive affirmations at your fingertips. You can pull them up before a work meeting and or when you have a quick break.

• Depending on what your faith is, turn to that to sharpen your positive self-reflection. For me, downloading my fav bible apps does just that. I have daily scripture verses that helps me refocus during the day when I feel stuck and or overwhelmed.

You Can Never Go Wrong with Guided Meditation: To decrease stressful situations, reaffirm our intuitions, connect with our inner self, and adapt healthy mind reset habits, below are some of my favorite guided mediation platforms and gurus.

• Black Girl in Om absolutely love them. Their mediation selection comes accompanied with relaxing music, while you let your mind and thoughts explore freely.

• Liberate Meditation: they are pretty much the bomb.com. this is a go to meditation spot for (Black, Indigenous and people of color). You can easily download their meditation app to reduce any anxiety or chronic stress you may be experiencing. My favorite part is their guided meditation that covers microaggressions, internalized racism, and the willpower of our ancestors.

• Black Zen: such a dope social movement focus on human tolerance. They have podcasts that covers wellness, grief, strengthening your wellbeing, and it’s done through humor, which I absolutely love.

Create a Self-Care and Positive Mindset Playlist: I like to think of myself as a music connoisseur at least that’s the lie I tell myself lol. I am a huge music fan and I have an eclectic collection of playlists from all genres. I think music is a great tool to help restore a positive brain power and reset your mind.

Create different playlists via iTunes, Spotify, Pandora, or whatever streaming service you prefer. These playlists should reflect your different mood and vibes. When your days get long, hectic, busy, and your mind is in overdrive perhaps a jazz playlist may suffice in calming you down regardless of the chaotic environment you may be in. And if you are feeling down, sad, and depressed, turn on your Bad Boss Bih Chunes—I'm talking Latto, my girl Megan Thee Stallion, Cardi B etc. And when you are looking for that women empowerment jam to shut ish down at work-you can never go wrong with a little Queen Beyonce etc.

Delete Your Social Media App and Take a Break: Ok let me not tell a lie and shame the devil lol…I’m still working on this lol. Sometimes the amount of social media we consume can be addictive, a complete distraction, and an overload on our brain. The time spent and hours wasted could actually be refocused and invested in other areas of life that can yield more positive result as it pertains to our wellness and mental health.

If you are scrolling through social media at odd times of the night trying to see what’s happening on the shaderoom then it’s clearly time to go into recovery mode. You may have a little withdrawal, but you can do it lol. I’ve been adapting these steps lately and it has helped me spend my time more wisely in connecting with the ones that matter the most to me in person.

To jumpstart this:

a) Set calendar reminders and timeline of when to de-active and reactive your account!

b) If option A is impossible for you, just delete the app from your phone and regain your liberation.

c) Go on a social media fast like you would with lent. Dedicate a few weeks or months to being offline and utilize that time to commit to your faith and positive activities that are more conducive to your life.

Prioritize Your Rest: This is a luxury but let’s turn this into a daily routine. The negative part about being someone who multi-tasks and is always on the go due to my own hyper independent nature, I tend to take on a lot more than I care to admit, which eats away from me adapting a healthy sleeping habit. For years, due to my hectic schedule and career, I thought I could survive on 4 hours of sleep a night, but that has come crashing down.

Now, I am making a conscious effort to slow down a little, to take on less, delegate more, channel my effort and investments into what serves my higher good and work smarter not harder. I've set a goal to turn my laptop off, not answer any emails or phone calls past a certain time. I utilize 30mins to meditate, go through my mindfulness and faith routine, and then turn the lights off and put in about 6-7 hours of sleep. We haven’t gotten this packed down entirely, but working on increasing my resting hours as much as I can.

Xoxo,

@Blackgirlsnamaste